Saturday, May 30, 2009

Lamar Odom

Do you know who Lamar Odom is because he's one of the most disputed talents in the modern basketball era. He is the quintessential mismatch with his 6'10" frame, left-handedness and ball-handling ability. But to the disputed part...he's accused of not showing up a lot and radio pundits march him to the trading block as often as kids skip lunch to play kickball. Lamar is the kind of guy that frustrates us fans because he doesn't always do what we think a highly compensated basketball veteran should. Lamar is also a reflection of us.

I can't get out of my head the characteristics of an NBA season that rise to my conscious mind thanks to Lamar Odom over the last nine years. I have to preface by saying that I didn't care for the guy when he was a Los Angeles Clipper fresh out of Rhode Island. Nevertheless, when I think of L.O., I'm reminded that players play 82 regular season games over a nine-month period. It makes me think...what if I numbered and named every problem I had in the last nine months? How many times was I discouraged, tired, sick, battling some form of apprehension toward a major challenge? Now imagine adding to nine-months of "life" the grueling demands of a professional athletics career. Aren't we all ontologically equal - subject to all of the same vulnerabilities? We have to be but we fans have created a false reality that makes Lamar Odom and his nine months of "life" only opportunistically compelling. Janet Jackson said it best when she sang, "What have you done for me lately?" Jackson's words are painfully accurate as fans are no more interested in the life of a Lamar Odom than they are in the lives of the thousands of people who drive past them daily.

See, Lamar Odom lost a child to sudden infant death syndrome in 2006. I'm not a parent but how do you just go out there and hit 20 and 10 when most days, even years later, you can't help but wonder what your son would be learning, speaking and demonstrating if he were alive. What mannerisms would he have acquired by now? But it doesn't matter because we just want to win. The irony, and it's taken me years to learn this one, is that if the Lakers win the championship I don't even get a free t-shirt. So why am I so intense? I should write L.O. and tell him I'm praying for his family. Once a dad, always a dad. That would help with "nine months of life" as a NBA star.

Sunday, May 24, 2009

Kobron or Lebrobe...more debate about who's better

Combine the names and it sounds like a high performance European sports car or maybe cologne. At any rate, I won't be back in the barber shop for a couple of weeks so I've gotten more fuel for my Kobe vs. Lebron "discussion" via teens, facebookers and pundits. So far the majority of Kobe haters who I've encountered still refer to his dynamic partnership with Shaq which went awry some fiv be years ago. Kobe is scapegoated as the reason why no championship parades have graced the streets of Los Angeles since 2002. You know LA. We love to win. We also love to cut our athletes' throats when they don't bring home the hardware. Lest I digress, however, Kobe is also considered less than manly for the way he is a bit of an isolationist. He's also been billed a coward because he didn't fight Karfl Malone when it was divulged that the mail man had delivered flirtatious remarks to Mrs. Bryant. Coward? Have you seen Karl Malone? There's a host of other reasons why Kobe is not the choic eof some Los Angelinos. I mean, if being from the hood is a badge of honor, sounds like Kobe is once again short of credentials.

On the other hand, Lebron fits that bill being poor and from Akron, Ohio. He's the epitome of the high school phenom who's success earned him a one-way ticket out of poverty. Heart-warming to say the least, it makes for a great documentary. And good grief, the King is only 24 years old. How's that for an up side. James is dominating the compwith physical prowess and a basketball IQ nearly unrivaled. He's a quesadilla...all of the best ingredients rolled into one bite and if you watch him enough, perhaps your inner Lebron starts to hate the seemingly over-confident, privileged kid from Philadelphia's Lower Merion in favor of you-know-who.

See, I don't think there's anything wrong with not liking the home time hero, though I happen to think he's great. But there's always something wrong with ignoring the point of a conversation. Who's the better player? Let's talk about basketball and save the emotion for more important discourse. Pseudo piety unintended.

Thursday, May 21, 2009

The Best Player Ever

So I'm talking to these guys at the barber shop about Kobe and Lebron. It was weird. You know how you end up in a conversation that you never meant to join? I'm the Laker fan unapologetically but I hate those pointless comparisons between players who are disimilar in so many ways. Kobe is 212 lbs and Lebron tips the scale at 260+. One is a forward the other a true scoring guard. One could play in the NFL and the other should definitely keep his day job.

Here's a question you ain't gonna hear in ya "Baba Shop". Why does everyone care so much about comparing athletes they'll never play against or meet? Next time you're gettin' your sideburns trimmed and pointed, ask somebody, during the heart of the discourse, why they care so much. There's a testy tenor in those atmospheres akin to when you're defending your mother's honor because she's just been called fat or ugly. Whether the accusations are true is besides the point right? You just put the gloves on and start the superhero bit. I'm just as guilty because there I was in the chair going back-and-forth with Laker haters who think Kobe shoots too much and doesn't make his teammates better. I was arguing like a 13-year old and I was mad for one reason. "They think their star is better than mine". I don't know Kobe and the only Lakers I've ever played with or against aren't the stars of the team. I should bring them up next time. Hey forget Lebron and Kobe, let's compare Jordan Farmar to the Spurs Jacque Vaughn. Nah, it's not nearly as fun.

In the end I guess Lebron should live on Twitter to check his rep every now and again. Hey it's safe King thanks to the conscientious purveyors of fine grooming. The LA guys like you more than the home town favorite.

Tuesday, May 19, 2009

I'll take the Physical Challenge

I'm 33 years old and if you're my age or no more than five years younger you remember these words from the Nickelodeon TV show Double Dare. If you didn't know the answer to a question on the kids talk show, I think you could take "the physical challenge". See http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zfmmt-QoP9g for an example of one. It was corny on a late 1980s, afternoon, pre HD, Joe Roganless kind of level. But man this 7th grader watched it religiously and sometimes I wonder...if I could, if you could take the physical challenge or face a Fear Factor-like option instead of dealing with whatever problem you're going through, would I/would you?

Think about it. Some test you took shows 65% and you have to tell your parents. You drive your car 10,000 miles before an oil change instead of the recommended 3,000 resulting in your car's demise. Or better yet, someone close to you is terminally ill and you are having a hard time coping. "I'll take the physical Challenge" you say and out comes the obstacle course complete with slime or fish entrails. Would you rather eat the stomach lining of a Tazmanian Devil than to face your most pressing conundrum? Would you bungy jump off of the Statue of Liberty or lick the bottom of a shoe you wore while in a public restroom?

It's interesting that life doesn't offer a shortcut to dealing with complexities. We're forced to our recourse which varies depending on the individual. People claim to be "keeping it together" as they face life's toughest challenges but how? No one keeps it together minus a perspective that a greater significance preempts the existing trial. What is the sovereign perspective that people possess? Are there more Theists out there than previously thought - people who genuinely believe in the Creator of the universe and that same Creator's providence? People are coping somehow because there are no "Physical Challenges". Double Dare went off the air in 1993-1994. People are makin' it or fakin' it but if they're makin' it because of something bigger than themselves...they should share the secret as if they've found the cure for Swine Flu.

Thursday, May 14, 2009

Chicken Pox

We grow out of lots of things during the transition from childhood to adolescence and beyond. We get childhood illnesses and move on vaguely remembering the itching and relief of calamine lotion. Well, I got the Chicken Pox when I was 18. 18!!! I thought I really was going to die. On the scalp, back, stomach...even inside the throat the onslaught left me 12 pounds lighter.

People talk about God as an afterthought akin to the pediatric pestilence we fondly remember and muse over when someone says, "How'd you get that ugly scar." But God and pox share few similarities. The point of the post here isn't to discuss chicken or other oddly named diseases. The "Pox" is a symbol of misplaced nostalgia such as when we reflect on the so-called naivete of faith in God. People walk around like they own the place (earth). Funny. Some owners we are hating, killing, cheating, behaving unnaturally and watching others do it. People renounce that they ever required the assistance of mythology (That's what bona fide Christianity is reduced to after people evolve) as if some ancient scroll revealed conclusively that divinity is pure illusion.

You know what's hard? Self-awareness and the willingness to trust instincts and intuition that run counter to many social mores. See, people walk away from faith because they're disappointed in the very people Jesus came to save. Imagine that...being upset at the creation and pretending that the creator doesn't exist. It's a logical fallacy. My watch is a creation but if it fails to tick, I don't pretend that Timex is illusory. Faith in God doesn't fade and people don't grow out of it but it can be strangled to death. Maybe we're too grown up for our own good (chuckle). I'm not sure it's amusing.

Tuesday, May 12, 2009

The Best Laid Plans...Often Go as Planned

The age-old aphorism is not consistent with this title. The plans go awry according to the Scottish poem by Robert Burns. But more practically, how many people actually plan anything? Get out of the romanticized view of yourself for a minute, applauding yourself for how you prepare for the annual review or the semester research project worth "mad" points. Yeah, you can bet my last money you'll prepare when it counts. Job in jeopardy? Grade at stake? We become the most meticulous tacticians. But I'm sitting here writing this post. Somebody convinced me that if you have a passion you've got to find others who share it.

So that's the plan...to find those who share conviction and reject nominal hum-drumity. So what if you pack your lunch every morning and know that you'll be at the gym by 4 and tucked in by 9. That takes little to no planning but the best laid plans of purposeful humanity hinge on ascribing value to what you'd pay yourself to do if you could afford it. Play your 6ixth Man! We learn pretty early in life that you're either into life for the pursuit of superficiality or things that matter. Ain't no other way you can put it. If you're chasin' loot and content with the chase, you've sold out. No plan required for that. If you've got an idea that helps others, and I'm sure you do. think it through and lay those plans down so people don't have to make up meaningful things to say in memoriam one day.

Sunday, May 10, 2009

The Best Laid Plans...Part One

As of Today the Lakers are tied 2-2 in their epic contest with the Houston Rockets. The most recent chapter was all but abyssmal to behold what with the Lakers' inefficiency. Rockets routed us today and without their two best players. It's proof positive of one thing though that runs a bit deeper than the hackneyed Tortoise vs. Hare fable. We know and underdog when we see one but at the end of the day, any professional contest features world class athletes vs. the like. So I'm not overly entralled with David vs. Goliath aphorisms. David was no underdog with his passion, skilled use of weaponry (sling) and most importantly, the favor of Yahweh. What's more interesting to me is the presumption of humans.

People, WE ARE THE LAKERS! We are the arrogant, self-righteous and the perpetually distracted. We are those who plan for tomorrow after having said yesterday that we would bask in the accomplishments of today. We look past the beauty of our journey missing all that is utterly valuable in life. Today happens to be Mother's Day. It was a balmy 74ish degrees in much of Southern California where I live. Many of us spent an afternoon with family or pets, perhaps children. Maybe you even managed a nap. "The best laid plans of mice and men often go awry." Careful what you take for granted be it the Yao-less Houston Rockets or the brief stint during which you live, move and have your being.

Thursday, May 7, 2009

Push Comes to a Shove

The method of choice is definitely force when playoffs come around. Did you catch Game 2 of Lakers vs. Houston in the 2nd round of the 2009 playoffs. Derek Fisher was ejected for an intentional elbow to the head of a Houston's Luis Scola who was setting a dirty screen. Then Von Wafer was sent to the showers by his own coach for basically being a bad employee and giving too much lip on the sidelines. Then Ron Artest was told to pack it up when he claimed Kobe elbowed him in the throat and got chest-to-chest with our team leader.

Physicality was at max levels with more than a little shovin' going on. Testosterone personified is what we experienced last night. Toughness came into discussion in other blogs and people said everything from, "The Lakers are dirty" to "It's all in the game". But two questions: #1 What's in the game that belongs there and doesn't? #2 What does the elite athlete really use as a motivator? My senior year in college (I think....it's been a while) I caught an elbow to the left eye socket during a game. My eye swelled nearly shut and coach sat me down because I was having trouble seeing the forest for the big puffy tissue obstructing the view. I never thought the guy who gave the elbow was dirty though. It just wasn't on my radar. Nor did I muse about vengeance. I took my lump and sported a black eye for a few weeks.

I think more important than the pushin' and shovin' is the motivation for wanting to win the NBA championship. Are Kobe and the gang keen on being the champ for bragging rights and another banner in the rafters of Stapledom or is it superficially the playoff bonuses players get for advancing deepest into the playoffs? Pros are so passionate, almost superfluously. Scratch that. They are definitely over the top but when the scratchin' and clawin' of NBA post-season begins (and it has) what's the reason? I play pick up hoop a lot and guys hold, push and trip. Let's just say when it comes to that littany of tactics, I'm not a fan. There's a definition of competition that rears its head every year about this time. Guys are exhibiting divine-like physical grace in nose-to-nose battle and then ruining the display with taunting of opposing players. Then afterward, both teams calmly and with erudite delivery address media as if they've just been out in the garden trimming a few prized roses. Duplicitous is a word I want to use but then I would sound like I think I'm anything better. I'm not. I just want to know to what extent the grappling affects society. I'm willing to fight over a few things but I'm not sure sports is supposed to be one of them.

Monday, May 4, 2009

Numb to Pain

I used to watch these "Faces of Death" videos that depicted amateur recordings of real-life horrific encounters between humans and anything capable of causing pain and/or fatality. We shouldn't have watched that stuff - creepy footage of people jumping from buildings, being mangled by wild alligators, thrown from vehicles, etc. I'm not even sure why we were interested in such things, especially since it was the real deal.

Pain is an awful reality. Athletes resist it, overcome it, concede careers to it. Lamar Odom experienced it a couple of years back when he lost his infant son to SIDS. Kobe Bryant endured it when he was publicly exposed for infidelity. Andrew Bynum withstood it in two consecutive years when he suffered knee injuries that cut his seasons short. The list of Pain's afflictees is endless and probably renders one truth. No one is numb and no one is exempt. We all hurt in various ways but numbness is the panacea of our age.

It seems like we seek anesthesia rather than remedy - the stuff that dulls the pain but leaves you vulnerable to its return. There are narcotics, alcoholic depressants, co-dependent relationships and a host of other shortcuts we embrace to escape pain. But pain alerts to illness and all illness requires treatment. Man you could write a book about pain and its benefits. But ain't nobody goona buy it (excuse the double negative). Nobody invites pain but it teaches so much. Make no mistake; pain is not to be sought but when it inevitably comes, we do well to note the causes and analyze them to the most minute component.

If you're an athlete prone to ankle sprains there's a reason for your predisposition. Muscular atrophy maybe? I recently discocvered patellar tendonitis complete with a side order of excruciating pain. For two years I medicated just to play hoop. I medicated the day of the Clippers workout and later during semi-pro games. 400, 600 then 800 mg just to suit up and "shoot the J...shoot it." I was clearly not numb to pain, just too stupid to address its source because healing takes a commitment. Anesthesia takes a moment. Once I chose healing, I found out one leg was 40% weaker than its counterpart. The weak leg was 1-inch smaller in circumfrence and my scar tissue around the injured knee became exposed.

I accepted my chicken leg and committed to physical therapy for 10 months. I'm not healed but I'm better and I can play the game without feelin' like a "junkie".

Sunday, May 3, 2009

Off the top Rope

That was my favorite wrestling move...anything off the top rope. I'm talking 80's so Jimmy "Superfly" Snuka, Ricky "The Dragon" Steamboat, Randy "Macho Man" Savage and other high fliers. You remember how tension would mount at the end of those classic WWF (pre WWE) matches as the hero or villain slowly ascended the turnbuckle to take flight and finish the vulnerable opponent who lay on the canvas. This was the culminating gesture mostly for the fan's delight but every now and then, the possum on the mat moved and the high flier proved fool hearty. He shouldn't have wasted time climbing the rope when he could have pinned his wounded victim and gotten the thing over with. On these occasions my crew of wrestling devotees watched in horror as our icon writhed in pain from hitting the mat instead of his enemy. Proof positive that if you toy with victory...well.

There's been a lot of talk in Lakerdom about the Purple and Gold blowing leads. Up by 20 in the 3rd quarter then struggling to beat teams by five points. Bloggers say that Kobe and friends have a defensive problem and need professional help. Others say it's the bench coming in and squandering the leads. There's a lot of sports being played at any moment of any day around the globe and I'm thinking the Lakers aren't the only one's guilty of "top-rope pride" which begs the question Why? What's in our nature that causes us to let up or assume that the "opponent" is done fighting?

There's a show I watch called "The Unit". They have a saying on the show that "a distracted solider is a dead solider". Morbid huh? Anyway, maybe CBS is on to something. Respectively we're all soldiers in some sense and distraction usually causes an undersirable outcome. At least I've found it to be true. If a win is a win, there's no need for top-rope theatrics. Maybe we're too showy - ostentacious gluttons for attention. I still have a little glutton in me but he's banned from the top rope.