ENEMY or OPPONENT?

We used to talk about opponents in basketball as the enemy. I took it literally too and struggled to turn that switch off sometimes. I mean, if you're a boxer, how do you beat a dude up or get beaten up and then shake that guy's hand after it's all over? I'll catch clips of UFC (Ultimate Fighting Championship) bouts from time-to-time and I marvel at the conditioning but even more-so at their ability to respect one another. Mixed Martial Arts (MMA) is brutal man. You're in a cage with a guy wearing compression shorts and you can't run. It's like kill or be killed or at least submit or force him into submission. The gloves are minimally padded too. I'm not sure I wanna do dinner after that meeting. But I'm sure many of them do.

I think that the difference between an opponent and an enemy is that an opponent is opposite you for a fixed period of time whereas your enemy...? Well, he's sworn, a lifetime foe, your permanent adversary. An enemy is probably sourced in evil, fully committed to your demise. That dude stickin' you on the perimeter (so-to-speak) is not necessarily an enemy though we might need to view him  that way for motivation's sake in the heat of a contest.

In hoop, I've seen players intentionally hurt people, namely in scenarios where two people are competing for the same contract or starting spot. I've been involved in those "scrimmages" that often become "skirmishes." There's nothing worse than someone taking a cheap shot at you. But I'm starting to recognize that while people do plenty of bad things, they themselves can change if they understand what's driving them to do the evil. Hood lessons are prolific and one of them (unstated of course) says that the best way to win a job is to eliminate the competition by any means needed. But subscribing to this thinking means we've bought a lie. Sooner or later there's always an opponent bigger, faster, stronger and more gifted than you. The ENEMY is not the dude guarding you; the enemy is YOU, or at least something in you.

How many times does fear lead us to cowardice. The player who's afraid of not getting the position will resort to all kinds of brutal tactics because he's selfish, arrogant and desperate. But when you face fears head-on, you can make sense of an opportunity and understand that our real enemy is probably almost always fear. There's a real enemy out there but he ain't a man. Most of the time he looks like LONELINESS, ANGER, ENTITLEMENT and even GRIEF. Don't people do weird things when they feel isolated, furious, like they deserve more or like they've lost something? I know I do. Next time you square up with an opponent, start trying to see the real enemy. Trust me, you'll play better.